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I can’t remember the last time I did a monthly update. Every month around the 30th it becomes a classic case of ‘Too many things to write about, don’t know where to start’, so I never start. To compensate, I am doing it a day ahead of the 30th. After all you get a chance like this only once in, oh I don’t know, 4 years!!
The most significant change since he was 23m (yeah, the archives tell me that was my last update!) has been the transformation into this independent, I’ll-do-it-all-myself boy. The independence hasn’t been a sudden, overnight change. It has been gradual, with hiccups, with new changes happening two days at a time, then relapsing back to old ways, then four days at a stretch then back again, then steadily a new habit taking over, the old one forgotten.
He wants to brush his own teeth, open the tap on his own, wash his own hands, wipe them away on his own, do his own laundry, fold his own clothes, drive his own car….sorry, I’m getting carried away here. He does want to do the laundry though, so I let him sit on the adjacent dryer and he tosses in clothes to the washing machine. He actually takes pride in little chores like this and if I don’t capitalize on it, I’d be a real idiot!
And the eating. Can there ever be an update without mention of eating? If I catch him at the right time, he refuses to be fed, and insists he will eat on his own. No kidding. The right time is that narrow window of opportunity between when he’s really hungry but not ravenous enough to be cranky. Yesterday was one such rare occassion. I made little balls of rice with ghee and salt, his ultimate comfort food, and put them on a little plate in front of him, he ate it all up with his fingers, wiping his right hand on his clothes every so often. Okay, that we have to work on, but get this, he finished in record time and even asked for seconds.
And showering. He’ll let me give him a shower. Always from the bucket using a mug, good old desi style, because he is scared of the overhead shower! But after I am done, he has to pour a few mugs on his left arm and declare I’m done before he will step out of the tub.
And sleeping. Twice recently, he went off to sleep all on his own. Normally, he needs me lying next to him, not pat him, not rock him, not sing (especially not sing!), just lie there so he can hold me and nod off. But on the two exceptional days, he didn’t want that either. He dropped down on the bed, asked to be covered and went off to sleep the way he does at naptimes in school. If there is one thing I want him to continue, this will be it. No, no, wait, I want it all to continue, and get better, but this is first on the list!
He is ultra-polite even when there is no need to be. I put food on the table, and he replies with a sincere ‘thank you’ and I want to tell him he doesnt have to thank me for the basics, but I don’t, for fear of confusing him. So I happily tuck away that little note of gratitude. It won’t be long before I’ll be begging for some appreciation, till that day comes, these little thank yous will keep me energized.
Now these are the picture perfect days. Obviously not every day goes so smooth or life would be so boring. There are days he refuses to cooperate or wants things done a certain way, and only a certain way, but he won’t tell me what way till after the fact.
I want an orange, he says. So I peel him an orange. He watches me peel it, without saying a word, but when I hand it to him, he refuses, no no I want an unpeeled orange.
This is the only orange I have.
No, no, I want it whole.
Okay, you can either eat this or eat nothing – what is your choice?
No, no, I want this orange, unpeeled. Put the peels back on the orange.
Unreasonable requests like this one have increased tenfold and so has his temper. Sometimes it scares me. I mean, what if he bursts a vein or something. He gets so red in the face, his eyes pop out, can so much anger be packed in less than three feet of vertical space? Imagine the pressure!
When it is just me and him or Bapa and us, I rarely see an outburst. But add a fourth person to the mix and something changes. He’s perfectly happy and content one minute; the next, something goes haywire and he can spark off for no reason whatsoever. The exact trigger remains a mystery.
Despite the sharp rise in tantrums, and increase in my responsibilities (oh, you know, things like disciplining and potty training and all that mundane stuff…), this phase – this 2-2.5 takes the cake. For the way he walks around with attitude, for the things he says as if he’s seen life, for the tremendous spurt in imagination, in language, in energy, in curiosity. I immensely enjoyed the crawling phase, the learning to talk phase, but my favorite so far is the now, the present.
Now let me rush over and get that brilliant anti-jinx badge before I eat my own words!
Follow-up to Is this over yet?
——————-
They traced our luggage at CDG. Apparently the three bags were sitting idle, learning French and waiting to be rescued.
Despite our formal baggage claim and all, tracing of the luggage didn’t happen till my dad used his muscle with some airlines’ contact and got the ball rolling. It is not for nothing that the family affectionately calls him Dubai Dada.
The three bags reached us today, still dressed in the plastic wrap we’d put on them at Chennai airport. Which means, US customs didn’t touch them. (Typically, unaccompanied bags are opened by default, and they end up breaking the lock, making the suitcase unusable from that point on.)
Guess Someone Somewhere is compensating us with little blessings.
So, I declare this chapter closed. Let the next one begin!
From the looks of it, Kodi is already planning his next adventure. The first thing he looked for when we got home was his toy plane and since then, we’ve been entertained to tall tales of how all in the family board Amlican Ailines to go to Dubai/Folida/Chennai, India/Chicago. Sometimes he’s the pilot, sometimes the passenger, sometimes the airline crew who hands out boarding passes. The only complaint I have of his stories is the airline he’s flying. Need to get him to change that!
The pile of tags sent my way is almost as tall as Kodi himself. In this series I attempt to sort them out one by one.
At last count, MummyJaan, Trishna and CA tagged me for this introspective tag of dusting off my old posts and showcasing them. This was terribly painful for me. I don’t like to read my old posts, and if I happen to be looking for something and read it by accident, I either gag or roll my eyes at all the peela I’ve written. Which defeats the purpose of the blog, because the whole point was just so I can read my posts for happy memories. This tag was a wake up call to fine tune my writing, to focus more on content than presentation.
So without wasting words, here are 5 posts that are associated with 5 keywords
Family
Dr. Seuss is in the House – the one where a grandfather acts like a toddler.
How can I do a tag without bending the rules? Am changing this keyword to Kodi, since posts on my friends remain as posts in my head. Someday, when I have my own blog..
Who, What, Where – when the questions came pouring.
Yourself
Two-oh – the only one I recall writing exclusively about myself, more like, my behavior.
Your love
The Story of Amma and Bapa – with apologies to the Bapa, who wasn’t too happy I posted this to begin with. It will be made private. Soon.
Random Pick
Is this over yet? – On the highly improbable set of “cosmic events” that we got caught in!
Whew! One done, few more to go..and I will spare from tagging anyone. Of course, you’re free to pick it up if you love reading your own posts…!
